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Bad Blood: Premier League Preview with Nick Chafey & Mr. Hand

Bad Blood: Premier League Preview with Nick Chafey & Mr. Hand

Nick Chafey

Photo credit: espnfc

Photo credit: espnfc

If you have taken the initiative to follow the Premier League this year, it’s highly likely that you found yourself lost and confused this past weekend. That is because after waking up at 6am and flipping on the television you couldn’t but help ponder, “Where are the soccer matches?” Well the Premier League took a break: an 1International break as they like to call it. These “breaks” are the weekends legislated by the world governing body of football, “FIFA”, that are marked out through the sporting calendar and are specifically meant for World Cup Qualifying or International friendlies. Players all across Europe and the world will fly back home to their respective nations for international fixtures and competitions. In a nutshell, it just means no Premier League. 

Mr. Hand is back and he will give us the run down for the week ahead. 

Well let me “point out” that the Premier League returns this week and this is the friggin' weekend not to miss!

I Really do mean it, don’t miss it.

Or… if you haven’t been watching the Premier League, this is definitely the weekend to start that new life resolution.

This is why…

The opening fixture for the weekend is the most anticipated clash of the year. Once confirmed that both Mourinho and Guardiola were the 2Gaffers at the two most renowned clubs in Manchester, the 3Doomsday Clock ticked one minute closer to midnight. It now is 11:57.

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   Photo Credit: CNN

Photo Credit: CNN

If you need more history on the two mangers, I recommend skimming Mr. Chafey’s first article on Premier League narratives and taking 10 minutes to read his latest article on his conflicted relationship with Manchester United. Absorb what you can about these clubs and their managers. If you are hardliner to the facts, just simply 4Wikipedia-ing the two dudes will suffice! I'm pretty sure the adversaries will take the 5Old Trafford pitch as Taylor Swift’s Bad Blood is deafly blaring out of the venues 6PA System.

You, the reader, you just need to imagine the two past allies walking out of the pitch 7tunnel to that catchy hook!

'Cause, baby, now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look what you've done
'Cause, baby, now we got bad blood
Hey
Now we got problems
And I don't think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And, baby, now we got bad blood
Hey

This game is set for a 6:30am early kickoff Saturday morning BUT for the sake of man-kind… pour yourself one heck of a bold, virtuous black cup of coffee and tune in for this one!!!

Once that derby concludes, stick around for some of the 9am kickoffs. These matches don’t have nearly the build up, but both Arsenal and Tottenham will be in action against Southhampton and Stoke City, respectively. The primetime kickoff for Saturday at 11:30am sees Jürgen Klopp’s Liverpool taking on 8PFA winner Riyad Mahrez and the Champions, Leicester City. The lone match Sunday sees Chelsea taking on Swansea, while the Monday fixture has Everton in action. 

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     Photo Credit: The Mirror UK

Photo Credit: The Mirror UK

Mr. Chafey, I'm “handing” back to you... the spotlight.

Thanks Mr. Hand, that was 2 Thumbs up. The Manchester Derby is one not to miss. Refer to Mr. Hand’s Handy Index below to learn a thing or two about some of the terminology and some common “football” knowledge. 

The Handy Index

1International Break: Time legislated by FIFA for International Matches and Competition.

The FIFA International Match Calendar (sometimes abbreviated as the FIFA Calendar) is an outline agreement between FIFA and the six continental football confederations.The match calendar sets out which dates can be used for 'Official matches' and 'Friendly matches'. The current dates are five: late March, early June, early September, early October and early November.

2Gaffer /ˈɡafər/

British Term for Soccer Coach or Manager

3Doomday Clock

The Doomsday Clock is a symbolic clock face that represents a countdown to possible global catastrophe (e.g., nuclear war or climate change).

4Wikipedia-ing

A verb describing Mr. Hand’s trustee, quick outsourcing method for collecting relevant and trival information.

5Old Trafford & Pitch

Old Trafford is Manchester United’s football stadium. Pitch refers to the playing surface or soccer field.

6PA System

Public Announcement Speakers

7Pitch Tunnel

In England, players typically take the pitch through a tunnel that emerges out of the center of the venue.

8PFA Winner

The Professional Footballer Association is the world’s oldest professional sport trading union. Each year the players of the union get together to determine 3 awards. Player of the year, Young Player of the year and the Merit Award. Riyad Mahrez last year was chosen as the Professional’s Player of the Year. 

*What was initially planned as a swift little write up… ended up being a two-hour project. Thanks in part to about 30 minutes of writing and a good hour and a half of Taylor Swift’s music videos. It took a good hour just to piece together that opening 30 seconds of her music video Blank Spaces. 

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